We all know the big guy in the red suit who breaks into our homes this time of year, ever year. He parks a team of eight hoven creatures on our roof (probably trenching it with the sleigh rails) and comes down the chimney (whether we have one or not). He bites off the cookie, drinks the milk, and leaves half the cookie and the dirty milk glass for someone else to clean up. I hear he has been caught a time or two kissing the lady of the house. We put up with these antics because he supposedly puts stuff under the tree to make us all have a Merry Christmas.

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